Knowledge Builders

what is the etiquette for an engagement party

by Twila Becker Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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  • Do choose your timing well and send your invites out early.
  • Don’t splurge unnecessarily at the party.
  • Do invite-only guests who will be at the wedding.
  • Don’t expect gifts, but keep an open mind.
  • Do welcome the guests personally.
  • Don’t attach your gift registry to engagement party invites.
  • Do keep your engagement party short and interesting.
  • Don’t forget to say thank you to the guests.

At an engagement party given by the bride's parents, the etiquette regarding toasts is quite clear: First, the bride's father proposes a toast to the bride and her fiancé. Then, the fiancé rises and toasts his bride-to-be and her parents, and then his own parents.

What are the rules for an engagement party?

just know that there are no rules, except this important one: Any guest invited to your engagement party should also be invited to your wedding. That means you should think about the size of your wedding before you set your guest list for the engagement party—you wouldn't want to have a 100-person engagement party if you're planning an intimate 50-person wedding.

What is the protocol for engagement parties?

  • Do choose your timing well and send your invites out early.
  • Don’t splurge unnecessarily at the party.
  • Do invite-only guests who will be at the wedding.
  • Don’t expect gifts, but keep an open mind.
  • Do welcome the guests personally.
  • Don’t attach your gift registry to engagement party invites.
  • Do keep your engagement party short and interesting.

More items...

What to do at an engagement party?

What to Do at an Engagement Party. Unlike bridal showers, engagement parties aren't typically as gift-centric (despite the fact that some guests will likely want to send or bring a gift). That means you probably won't devote any time to opening gifts in front of the group. Instead, this party's mostly about eating and drinking, catching up with ...

What to give for an engagement party?

What should parents give as an engagement gift?

  • For their relationship: Lasting app.
  • For their kitchen: The Newlywed Cookbook.
  • For after the big day: HitchSwitch.
  • For the holidays: A Custom Ornament or Holiday decoration.

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Are you supposed to bring a gift to an engagement party?

Nowadays, it's common for guests to bring a gift to an engagement party, but it's usually something small and sentimental. Don't feel pressured to give an elaborate or expensive gift. If you wish to bring a gift, you can, but bring it to the gathering itself.

What are the rules for an engagement party?

The Dos and Don'ts of Engagement Party EtiquetteDo: Figure out who will host the engagement party. ... Don't: Invite people you know won't be invited to the wedding. ... Don't: Assume you will—or won't—receive gifts. ... Do: Keep it casual. ... Don't: Save your parents' first meeting for the engagement party.More items...•

How much money do you give for an engagement party?

The Gift Amount Aim for the engagement party gift to be around one-quarter to one-third the cost of the wedding gift.

What kind of gift do you give for an engagement party?

If you do want to give a gift, what kind is appropriate? Gift cards, a check, or cash always make a much-appreciated present. If you want a gift that underscores the celebratory aspect of getting engaged, pick out two or four champagne flutes. Or bring a bottle of Champagne or prosecco.

Who throws the engagement party?

Traditionally, engagement parties are hosted by the bride's parents, but really anyone can throw the engagement party. Some couples even choose to throw their own celebration!

Who gets invited to the engagement party?

Answer: When it comes to your engagement party guest list, you should invite both sides of the families, any close friends, and wedding party members. You don't have to confirm your entire wedding party before you host an engagement party, but you should invite all potential wedding party members.

Do parents give an engagement gift?

While engagement gifts from parents aren't required, they can be a special way to show your enthusiasm for the newly engaged couple as they kick off wedding planning.

What is the purpose of an engagement party?

An engagement party, also known as a betrothal party or fort, is a party held to celebrate a couple's recent engagement and to help future wedding guests to get to know one another.

What is a traditional engagement party?

An engagement party is a celebration for the newly engaged couple within 2-3 months of their engagement. Families on both sides, close friends, and wedding party members gather to congratulate the couple on their news formally. Traditionally, the bride's parents host the engagement party.

Are flowers a good engagement gift?

A bottle of bubbly or bouquet of flowers is more than enough for an engagement party gift. It's also perfectly acceptable to give the lovebirds a gift card instead. A certificate for their favorite local restaurant will help them celebrate the good news.

What is an appropriate dollar amount for a wedding gift?

On average, most guests will spend between $75 and $200 on wedding gift money, according to Tendr. And if you're still struggling to figure out how much to give for a wedding gift, Tendr reports the national average for wedding gift money is $160.

Can you invite someone to an engagement party and not the wedding?

Everyone at the engagement party should be invited to the wedding, but not everyone invited to the wedding needs to be invited to the engagement party. Typically, engagement parties are more intimate than weddings, with a range of 10 to 75 people.

What Happens at an Engagement Party?

Speeches, toasts, love stories, some dancing, and fun questions happen at an engagement party. It’s also an opportunity for families and friends to...

Are engagement parties still a thing?

Engagement parties are a beautiful way to share your joy with your nearest and dearest. In fact, it sensitizes you towards planning the wedding pro...

Do you give speeches at an engagement party?

Yes, speeches are important at an engagement party. The best persons to give speeches are the new couple. If they’re not up to it, the parents or m...

How many hours should an engagement party be?

An engagement party should last a maximum of four hours. So factor in the drinking, partying, speeches, and everything else. This will allow the gu...

Your Family Should Give You Time to Breathe.

An impromptu family gathering the weekend after your partner proposed is the perfect opportunity to break out the vintage champagne, but don't sche...

Find Out The Size of Your Wedding.

Everyone who's invited to the engagement party should ultimately be invited to the wedding. Otherwise, guests might wonder what they did at the eng...

Consider What Will Make The In-Laws Most comfortable.

Since the engagement party custom was actually designed to help you start building bridges between your families, consider their style. If one of y...

Register For Gifts beforehand.

While guests have not brought presents to this function traditionally, increasing numbers do today, so it's only fair to provide guidance. Register...

Remind Yourself That There's Still A Wedding to Throw.

Every host wants to plan an unforgettable affair, but you never want to upstage the main event. Try to create a different mood for the engagement p...

When is an engagement party?

The purpose of an engagement party —usually scheduled no later than three months after the big announcement—can be threefold: to share the news of your imminent union with future wedding guests, to introduce your families to each other and to celebrate the impending, well, celebration. Tradition has it that the bride's parents host ...

What to do after your partner proposes?

1. Your family should give you time to breathe. An impromptu family gathering the weekend after your partner proposed is the perfect opportunity to break out the vintage champagne, but don't schedule an all-out opulent affair during the first month of your engagement.

Should everyone be invited to an engagement party?

Everyone who's invited to the engagement party should ultimately be invited to the wedding. Otherwise, guests might wonder what they did at the engagement party to insult you. That said, if you decide to host your own wedding and keep the list small but you want to throw an extravagant engagement party, go for it. Just be sure to let people know that the wedding will be small so no feelings will be hurt when guests aren't invited to the wedding. If you're worried your friends will think you want to have a big bash solely to garner gifts, include a note in the invitation that requests no presents.

Is a cappuccino maker a good engagement present?

Register for gifts in the low to middle range—a $500 cappuccino maker is not your typical engagement present. If some guests arrive bearing gifts, just be sure you unwrap them after the party or away from the crowd, so people who came empty-handed won't feel uncomfortable.

What is engagement party?

An engagement party kicks off the many celebrations that come before your wedding. While this is usually fun, relaxed get-together, there are certain engagement party etiquette rules that should be followed before, during, and after the event.

What to do if your parents haven't met?

If you and your future spouse’s parents haven’t met yet, try to schedule their meeting for before the engagement party – even if it’s the night before or morning of. Choose a quiet restaurant (it’s neutral territory, as opposed to someone’s house) so that everyone can talk in a peaceful setting – both parties will appreciate it.

Do brides parents host engagement parties?

Traditionally, the bride’s parents host the engagement party, but these days, anything goes—from the groom’s parents hosting to a group of friends or other family members taking the reins. Some couples even have two (or more!) engagement parties if each partner’s families are from completely different parts of the country or world. And if you want to host your own engagement party, go for it – many couples like to host their own casual gatherings with friends to celebrate.

Can you mix and mingle with your spouse?

If your and your spouse’s families don’t know each other well, things may be a little awkward – and that’s okay. By keeping the atmosphere super-relax ed (think: backyard BBQ or casual eatery), guests will feel more comfortable mixing and mingling with each other.

Can you invite people to a wedding?

Don't: Invite people you know won’t be invited to the wedding. For the most part, guests will likely assume that if they’re invited to the engagement party, they’re invited to the wedding—and it’s proper engagement party etiquette to ensure the two guest lists align.

Can you have two engagement parties?

Some couples even have two (or more!) engagement parties if each partner’s families are from completely different parts of the country or world. And if you want to host your own engagement party, go for it – many couples like to host their own casual gatherings with friends to celebrate.

Do you have to bring gifts to an engagement party?

Guests don’t have to bring gifts to engagement parties—and it’s not proper engagement party etiquette to directly ask for gifts. In fact, many couples prefer to have a “no gifts” policy to take the pressure off their guests. However, you should expect that at least some people will want to bring gifts to the party, ...

What to expect at an engagement party?

Guests are expected to wear appropriate attire, mingle, and be mindful of alcohol consumption. Hosts will be busy making the rounds. The happy couple should greet every guest in attendance and thank him or her for coming.

How to know when to invite for engagement party?

Guests should easily know just from reading the invitation where the engagement party will take place, the time and date it begins, and if you may bring along a plus-one. More granular details may also be included in the invitation, such as whether food or drinks will be served and the length of the engagement party.

What is the easiest baseline for a wedding?

The easiest baseline is to start with the couple’s family members and individuals you have mutually agreed should be in the wedding party. Do you still struggle to wrap up the guest list? Norian suggests asking yourself one question: Do I want this person to celebrate with me on my wedding day? Remember that any guest who receives an invitation to the engagement party will likely assume they will be invited to your wedding. Asking this question gives the couple the chance to mutually make judgment calls together.

What is traditional wedding etiquette?

Traditional wedding etiquette encourages major gift-giving to take place during bridal showers. Most large purchases may be made through various wedding registries, which the couple will provide more information about at a later date. There’s only one thing left for hosts and guests to do at an engagement party.

Why do people attend engagement parties?

The event is meant to celebrate the couple’s engagement. It also introduces the two families to one another as well as future wedding guests.

What to include when sending a physical RSVP?

If you decide to send a physical invitation, include a card (and envelope) for the guest to mail in their RSVP. Encourage individuals with digital invitations to check their inboxes and RSVP as soon as they are able.

What is Joy's guest list manager?

Please don’t tell us your organization method was going to be “write everyone’s names down in a notebook!” Joy’s guest list manager organizes your guest list and keeps the details of your big day conveniently in one place. Use labels to categorize guests, assign plus-one invites, and track RSVPs. Working from an existing spreadsheet? No problem — import it in and let Joy take care of the organization. Added bonus: Joy’s guest list manager is completely free, and any freebie you can snap up while wedding planning is good.

What is engagement party?

Generally speaking, an engagement party isn’t the time to be flashy or to show off your ability to give an over-the-top gift. Kevin Dennis of Fantasy Sound Event Services in Livermore, California says when the couple does welcome tokens of celebration for their upcoming wedding, it’s better to go on the softer, simpler side than the extravagant. After all, the purpose of the gathering isn’t to show off but to pay tribute to the start of this journey. “An engagement party is more for the sole purpose of celebrating this new journey toward a big milestone in the couple’s lives, so it’s completely okay to just bring yourself,” he explains.

Can you invite someone to an engagement party?

Though there are exceptions to every rule, the Audrey Craig of GB Design House in Austin, Texas says etiquette dictates that anyone invited to the engagement party will also be encouraged to attend the wedding, too. In terms of budget, this is a way to think about how much you want to contribute to one gift versus another. Since wedding experts agree gifts—if any—can be small for the ‘we’re engaged!’ shindig, consider this your reminder to save appropriately. After all, you want to really show up for the big day, since it’s more important than an afternoon BBQ or happy hour for their engagement.

Can you bring a gift to an engagement party?

Blame it on the way you were raised or your ongoing pursuit to be the best-est friend out there, but arriving to any event without something feels, well strange. It may be difficult to resist, but if the couple specifically asks you not to bring a gift…don’t bring one, Zeile says. Though it may come across as harmless from your perspective, you do risk the chance of embarrassing them or other guests (not to mention going against their engagement party gift etiquette rules), should there be an underlying reason why they went gift-less. If you simply have to do something, Zeile recommends bringing a card and giving it to them privately.

Guests Who Are Invited to the Engagement Party Should Also Be Invited to the Wedding

Who should you invite to an engagement party? When it comes to throwing your engagement party, a big thing to keep in mind is that whoever you choose to invite should also receive a wedding invitation. If someone’s invited to one and not the other, it might be confusing for your engagement party guests—and possibly even insulting.

Consider Your In-Laws and Their Level of Comfort

Because engagement parties tend to be the place where the happy couple’s families meet for the first time, keeping your in-laws’ level of comfort in mind is a good way to guide the party planning. If your future in-laws are very family-oriented, it might be a good idea to include as much of the extended family as you can within your guest count.

Try to Have a Budget and Stick to It

As you make arrangements for your engagement party, another thing to keep in mind is that whoever hosts the engagement party generally pays the bill. That's why having a budget—and sticking to it—is really important. “Budgeting is the number one most challenging aspect of event planning.

Don't Let the Engagement Party Outshine the Wedding

Everyone wants to be a great host and have a celebration that people will remember. But as you plan your engagement party, remember: This is just the first in several wedding events that will take place over the next few months. Engagement parties are generally held within the first three months of the announcement being made.

What is an engagement party?

Traditionally, engagement parties were cocktail hours hosted by the family of the bride. Nowadays, the affair can be as big or small, formal or informal as you'd like! Part of the fun of an engagement party is tailoring it to your precise vision.

Why do couples have multiple engagement parties?

Many couples celebrate with multiple engagement parties because their friends and family are spread all over the place.

Is engagement party formal?

As with many modern matrimonial events, your engagement party can be as formal or relaxed as you'd like. Engagement party etiquette isn' t as hard and fast as it once was. When it comes time to plan yours, consider the mood you'd like to set.

Is an engagement party gift centric?

Unlike bridal showers, engagement parties aren't typically as gift-centric (despite the fact that some guests will likely want to send or bring a gift). That means you probably won't devote any time to opening gifts in front of the group.

Do you send an engagement party invitation to your parents?

However, if you two or your parents are hosting, the old rule sticks: When the wedding hosts send the engagement party invitation, it's considered part of the official wedding festivities, and guests assume they're invited to the wedding too. To avoid hurt feelings and an awkward situation later, start working on your wedding guest list now, then trim the engagement party list down to your wedding party, immediate families and close friends.

Can parents come together for an engagement party?

Both sets of parents can come together to cohost an engagement party, the couple can throw one themselves or friends of the couple can do the honors. Just keep in mind that if the couple does the inviting, it's their responsibility to foot the bill too.

Can you have more than one engagement party?

Traditionally, the bride's parents are expected to host the first official celebration, then the groom's parents can throw their own party ( yes, you can have more than one engagement party). But this way of doing things is by no means the rule. Both sets of parents can come together to cohost an engagement party, ...

What to give a bride who is getting engaged?

Gift cards, a check, or cash always make a much-appreciated present. If you want a gift that underscores the celebratory aspect of getting engaged, pick out two or four champagne flutes. Or bring a bottle of Champagne or prosecco. The bride probably hasn't registered yet but in case she has, look there for ideas.

Can you hand over a wedding certificate to a couple?

You can hand it over in person or send it to the couple. But don't expect them to open it during the festivities.

Do you bring a gift to a bridal shower?

When you get invited to a bridal shower, you know you're supposed to bring a gift. The same rule applies if you get an invite for a wedding—you'll check out the couple's registry and send something because that's what's customary. But what about an engagement party?

Is there a set amount for wedding gifts?

As with wedding gifts, there's no set amount. Spend what you can afford while keeping in mind that this isn't the wedding, so the dollars spent should reflect that.

Is it necessary to bring a gift to a wedding?

No. It's totally optional. A close friend or family member, like an aunt or cousin who's particularly fond of the bride or groom, often brings a gift but for everyone else, it's not expected or necessary.

How to have an engagement party?

Where To Have An Engagement Party? 1 The location of the hosts: An engagement party will hold wherever the hosts reside. Unless there are a discussion and agreement for a change of venue, the couple will go to them. This also opens the couple to the possibility of more than one party. 2 The location of the bulk of guests: This is another important factor, as it will be best to hold the party where most of the guests are resident. This is better than pulling them out of one location to another, for a party. 3 The intended location for the wedding: In the reverse of asking all your guests move from a particularly concentrated area, you can host your wedding at theirs. This rules out the stress of guests having to travel twice. 4 The type of engagement you plan to have: If you want casual, then a home, backyard, or park is it. For a casual or semi-casual, a garden, restaurant, country club, or private hall suits.

What to expect at an engagement party?

There’s no setup rule of what to expect at an engagement party. The day and night’s aim is to have all the fun. But a few things could happen. The parents may be meeting for the first time, so an introduction is imminent. Guests will come bearing hearty engagement wishes to the couple. Families and friends from both sides will meet, have fun, and mingle. Icebreaker engagement party games are also a must feature for a fun engagement dinner party. Also, the couple will begin brainstorming ideas with their teams for the wedding.

How to invite guests to a wedding?

Invite your guests through email or formal wedding invite. Do not use social media, except you create a closed group. This is to avoid hurting people’s feelings.

What is a wedding party?

But these days, the couple, friends, family, or even colleagues do the honor. The party is what it is, a celebration that brings all the potential wedding guests together.

What is the first feeling of engagement?

First feeling, excitement! You can’t believe you’re engaged. Bask at the moment. Then, you’ve settled into reality, and plans for the wedding are about to roll out. Between the last two scenarios is the perfect time for an engagement party.

How many parties can you have to celebrate an engagement?

Bear in mind that there’s no rule which says that there must be only one party to celebrate an engagement. There can be as many parties by whoever wants to throw one. Again, whoever hosts the party, foots the bill.

Why is it important to maintain lighthearted conversations?

Maintain lighthearted conversations focused on the event. This is because it’s a gathering of different people who may have never met. You don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.

What to send to friends when they tie the knot?

You could send flowers or champagne to your friends as soon as you know they’re tying the knot or opt to wrap something and bring it with you to the engagement party.

Do you need to give a gift for an engagement?

The good news is, engagement gifts are not required, no matter how fancy the celebration. Even if the pair already set up their registry, that doesn’t mean you’ve got to click “buy” before they’ve even sent out invitations. Oftentimes, close relatives and friends of the couple will show up with a gift, ranging from a book of wedding inspiration to a traditional wedding gift like a pretty frame or serving platter.

Can you bring a gift to an engagement party?

Nowadays, it's common for guests to bring a gift to an engagement party, but it's usually something small and sentimental. Don't feel pressured to give an elaborate or expensive gift. If you wish to bring a gift, you can, but bring it to the gathering itself.

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1.Engagement Party Etiquette 101: An Updated Guide + Tips

Url:https://www.weddingforward.com/engagement-party-etiquette/

9 hours ago  · The engagement party invitation etiquette states that you should decide on what kind of party you want to have. If you want a formal affair with full course dinners, send paper invites to your guests. If you’re going for a casual affair, send out e-vites or emails to your guests. Send them out a month in advance.

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21 hours ago  · An engagement party kicks off the many celebrations that come before your wedding. While this is usually fun, relaxed get-together, there are certain engagement party etiquette rules that should be followed before, during, and after the event. By following this advice, you’ll avoid sticky situations as you move into the wedding planning process.

5.Engagement Party Etiquette 101 - Zola Expert Wedding …

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30 hours ago  · One piece of banter that is unwelcome at an engagement party is marital advice. Avoid using outdated sayings such as “locked it down” or asking when the couple plans to have children. These conversation starters are quick to spoil the mood during this celebratory time. Engagement Party Gifts

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26 hours ago  · Do: Respect the couple’s wishes. Blame it on the way you were raised or your ongoing pursuit to be the best-est friend out there, but arriving to any event without something feels, well strange. It may be difficult to resist, but if the couple specifically asks you not to bring a gift…don’t bring one, Zeile says.

7.Engagement Party Gift Etiquette | Martha Stewart

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17 hours ago Do something that encapsulates you and your partner's personalities, but don't feel pressured to break the bank or host a really lavish formal affair. Do what feels right for you, with the focus being on you and your partner, your engagement party guests, great food and drinks, and having a wonderful time.

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27 hours ago  · Gift cards, a check, or cash always make a much-appreciated present. If you want a gift that underscores the celebratory aspect of getting engaged, pick out two or four champagne flutes. Or bring a bottle of Champagne or prosecco. The bride probably hasn't registered yet but in case she has, look there for ideas.

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